Overcoming Your Inner Conflicts

Have you ever argued with yourself about something? Have you eaten that cookie, even though part of you told you not to? Have you ever heard yourself say “why did I say that?” or “why did I do that?”{{more}}

We all have different parts, or aspects, to our personalities. One part might be shy, while another part feels bold or confident. No, you don’t have multiple personalities; you have different parts of your subconscious mind.

We all have an inner child, some of us have a stubborn part, a rebellious part, a strong part, a creative part and the list goes on. Realizing the existence of these parts can improve our chances of successfully reaching our goals and finding peace in our lives.

I use the concept of “Parts Therapy” in my work with clients who are having a hard time giving up smoking, losing weight, sleeping or reaching other goals.

In hypnosis we convene a “meeting of the parts” where each part presents their motives and needs in order to facilitate a compromise to overcome their conflict.

For example, a woman came to me to lose weight. She tried everything but was unsuccessful. In hypnosis she realized that when she was younger and sexy looking, she got a lot of unwanted attention and was molested. Her unconscious mind was keeping her heavy to try to protect her from attracting sexual attention. There was a part of her who was afraid to lose weight. We were able to empower her adult resourceful part to assure she could protect herself and the weight came off.

When clients come to me to quit smoking, there is a part of them that want to continue to smoke. In hypnosis, when I communicate with the part that wants to smoke, they report that they want to smoke to relax and help them cope with stress. This part also acknowledges that they do not want cancer. The part that wants to be a nonsmoker wants health, happiness and to eliminate the stinky habit. When the opposing parts negotiate, they come up with alternatives to smoking that provide the same, or better results than smoking provided.

One woman who had already lost a lung to cancer could not figure out why she could not stop smoking. Many people she loved died from smoking. Under hypnosis, she realized that subconsciously, she ultimately wanted to be with them. With my help, she successfully stopped smoking when the part of her that loved her husband and children finally prevailed.

Each of our parts has a specific role or goal. Sometimes it is to protect us and sometimes it is to punish us. Some of us feel guilty and believe we need to be punished. Often we learned this from a parent and incorporated it into our unconscious beliefs. Inner conflict is not new, but using it as an approach to find solutions to our long standing problems is very effective as one of the many tools in hypnosis. Although many people come to me as a last resort, hypnosis is the most effective way to identify our parts and resolve our inner conflicts.

Fern is a certified hypnotist, life coach and health educator. She can be reached at 203-283-4567. www.myhealinghypnosis.com.